Dinner Date

Evans knocked three times on the side of the dugout, then stepped through the door. He looked around at the bored looking miners and Polly. He pulled the scroll out from under the crook of his arm and unfurled it, even though knew the statement by heart. Stupid tradition. “I am most honored to present The Most Beautiful, Marriageable Lady Demetria Kestel, Heiress to the Duchy of Medway, Captain in the 202nd Infantry, who sheathed her blade inside Baron Semyon of Kalach at Urbs.”

Captain Kestel then entered in the finest clothing she had. Her cleanest jacket with all her medals pinned on and the rarely used officer’s skirt. Evans had even polished her boots to a mirror shine. A mirror shine that he would have to take off tomorrow. If this was a date, so far, Evans had put most of the work into it. And he wasn’t getting anything out of it. He probably wouldn’t even get dinner tonight.

Polly stood up and pointed to a side room, “Captain Stoddart has asked for you to wait in his office. He is currently inspecting the number three shaft and I shall retrieve him.” She did an about turn and walked into the mine entrance.

Evans led Captain Kestel into the office and pulled the door close. The Captain walked to the closest chair, sat down, and put her feet up on the desk. Evans leaned against the wall and sighed, “I hate you so much.”

Captain Kestel flipped her hair, “Why? Are you saddened because a poor farmer such as you will never have the chance to wed me?”

“Oh man, you’ve caught me. Every day. I’m like, man, I would murder my wife and daughter just for one night in Captain Kestel’s bed. To get the chance to marry you would be unimaginable,” Evans faked crying.

Putting her hand on her chin, Captain Kestel responded, “You know, technically we slept in the same bed several times when we were up here in December. So you will have to kill them.”

“I hardly think that counts Cap,” Evans lit a cigarette and took a puff. “When someone says they want to spend time in someones bed, they are thinking of some sort of sexual enco-”

Blushing, Captain Kestel put a hand over her face, “I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN!”

“Are you sure?” Evans bent down, blew some smoke into the Captain’s face, and whispered into her ear, “I could give you a demonstration.”

“Oh yes, yes, take me now,” Captain Kestel and Evans stared at each other intensely for a moment before breaking out laughing.

“No, but seriously,” Evans took another puff, “It takes so long to introduce you.”

There was a knock at the door. Captain Kestel quickly straightened out her uniform. Evans walked over and opened the door. Evans saluted Captain Stoddart then left the room.

Polly waved him over to a table the miners were sitting at. He walked over and sat down. The miners were kind of creepy. They were all staring at him. Polly smiled, “Walls can be very thin Evans.”

Evans was confused for a moment, then he realized, “Oh shit. Um… Oh God.”

One of the miners, heavily bearded and covered in dirt said, “From what I could hear of the conversation, I could probably get a lot of money from a tabloid. I can see the headline now,” He spread his hands out, “Lady Demetria in Love Affair with Poor Farmer. Pregnant?” The man extended his hand to Evans, “I’m Clay by the way.”

Shaking the hand, Evans responded in kind, “Jim Evans, and, sorry, You’re a miner named Clay?”

“Wow, I have never heard that before. Are you some sort of genius?” Clay laughed, paused a moment, and then started pointing out everyone, “So, I’m Clay. That’s Basil. Next to him is Breezy. Next to her is Bob. Next to him is Brynn. Next to her is Chris. And you already know Polly, the most useless person in the world.”

“Hey! I’m not useless! I have lot’s of talents!”

Basil spoke up, “OK, what talents do you have for a mining operation?”

“That isn’t my job though. I am here to provide security and administrative support. So there.”

“And Cap Winny needs his garden, I saw him give you a green gown” Bob laughed.

Polly looked indignantly, “Well he’s a good Gardener. Plus I like the green gown.”

Clay, Basil, Bob, and Chris all started to sing, “An’ then they began, / Like lightnin’ an’ thunder / An’ then they began, / Like lightnin’ an’ thunder / On the green green grass, / Pretty Polly layin’ under. / Just lie your leg over me, do!”

Brynn smirked, “See, you should have planned ahead. The only song with my name is Lines on the Brynn.”

“Well it’s better than when I went by Ann. People would ask me to dance the Tra-la-la-loo and call me Greenmount Smiling Ann,” Polly shrugged.

Bob leaned forward, intrigued, “So, Greenmount Smiling Ann, is that nickname based on reality?”

Polly sighed, “You wouldn’t understand.” She looked at Breezy and Brynn, “Don’t you agree, the feeling of wet grass on your back, staring up at the sky?”

“Oh my God you miners are so weird,” Evans slapped his hand on the table, “Polly, you really like being fucked outdoors on grass. We all know what you’re talking about. Goddammit in the Infantry we can speak without all these stupid fucking metaphors.”

It was silent for a moment. Breezy giggled, “Maybe they just put all the smart people here. All you need for infantry is a pair of legs and a rifle. So we use our brains to make metaphors and things.”

The playful arguments continued for an hour before Captain Kestel exited the room. She nodded to Evans, who got up, stuck his tongue out, and followed the Captain out. Evans looked down at Captain Kestel, “So how’d it go?”

“Oh God I was so bored,” Captain Kestel put her hand over her face, “At first I was having a good time. Then he gets to the real reason he asked for dinner. He asked me if he could visit me some time after the war. To look at rocks. He was not interested in marrying me in any way. Apparently Medway has really good rocks. After I said yes out of politeness, he proceeded to ask me questions about all the rocks around my families castle and what it was made of. Why would I know what my castle is made of? Stones? Does anyone even know what their castle is made of?”

“I for one don’t know what my castle is made of,” Evans laughed, “My house is made of wood though.”

“Gah, I hope you get killed in the attack,” the Captain laughed, “Then I can have a proper assistant who will not give me any lip.”

 

Back at the Front

The sun started to rise on the Sixth of July. It was a bit foggy, but, not a bad day.  Four days until he would probably be killed, but about a week since he had made hay with Anna. So all in all, pretty OK.

“So, better or worse?”

“Hmm?” Evans looked at Captain Kestel.

“You defended White Beach a year ago. Do you think this will be Better or Worse?”

“Well, last time I did get hit by an artillery shell,” Evans stroked his chin, “On the other hand, I met the most beautiful woman.”

“Incorrect.”

“Excuse me?”

“That would be illegal,” Captain Kestel undid her hair and fluffed it, “For I am the Most Beautiful Woman in All the Land… I think… Yeah, there aren’t any Duchess’s right now, and I am the only female heir to a Duchy. Though, Duke Newacre is getting pretty old, and third in line is Lady Brianna, so, probably two years tops until I am only Most Beautiful Woman in Medway. Probably the only way your wife could be more beautiful than me would be to for her to be awarded a Duchy. Wait, where was Anna born again?”

“Silesia.”

“Then definitely no for two reasons. One, legally, women from Ethslin are more beautiful than women from any other country. Which is a bit weird, I’m not really sure why that is a law, but, it is. Two, Duchies can only be awarded to natural born citizens. In theory, if you were awarded a Duchy,  she would become about a rung of beauty below me. But, you would first have to be commissioned, probably through some act of extreme gallantry. Then you would need to rise through the ranks until you are a General. At this point, you will probably get a Viscountship. Then, you need to do accomplish some sort of great victory on the battlefield. Then, if you are really really lucky, the Oligarchs might deem you important enough to maybe get a Duchy. And I would still be more beautiful than her.”

“Can you get stripped of your title somehow?”

“Excuse me? Lady Demetria?”

The two turned to look at the newcomer. It was Polly. Captain Kestel nodded, “You may speak.”

“I’m the soldier you borrowed a blanket from about six months back Lady. Would you have a moment to spare for a word from my Commanding Officer?”

Captain Kestel nodded. Polly signaled back behind her, and Captain Stoddart stepped out. He approached Captain Kestel and bowed, “It is an honor to be in your presence Lady Demetria Kestel of Medway. I am Lord Winston Stoddart the Third of Halsey.”

Captain Kestel did a half curtsy and responded, “To what do I owe the pleasure Lord…” She looked up and scrunched her eyebrows, “Sorry, I do not remember. Is your father still alive?”

“And my grandfather, so I will not be Lord Halsey for a while. Just Lord Winston for now.”

Evans and Polly walked out of earshot to give the two privacy, “I didn’t know Captain Stoddart was noble.”

Polly nodded, “He doesn’t like to bring it up. He says he’d rather be judged on his own merits.” She sighed, “He does brag a lot about how smart he is though.”

“Yeah, plus, he really loves talking about rocks.”

She laughed, “Oh God, there have been a few times where he has run out of the mine, pulled me off watch, and shown me some sort of rock thing.”

“Yeah,” Evans smiled, “First platoon meeting, he gathered us all to talk about some rocks he found. Taught me a valuable lesson that I still use to this day. You can ignore everything an officer says that isn’t a direct order.”

“Polly!” Captain Stoddart shouted, “Polly! Back to the mine!”

“See ya later Evans,” Polly smiled, turned, and followed Captain Stoddart back to the entrance of the trench system.

Evans walked back to Captain Kestel. He started to salute when she grabbed his hands and started bouncing. The Captain had a huge smile on her face, “Guess what just happened?”

“Uh…”

“Winston asked me to dinner. Tomorrow night,” She hugged him, “I’m so excited! And he is so great, he is smart, funny, cute-”

Lieutenant Colonel Strummer cleared her throat, the three exchanged salutes. “Captain Kestel. Two things. First, I need your Company Fitness Report in a two hours. Second, I am fine if you two are friends, just try to be more discreet about it. Always salute in public and no touching.”

Captain Kestel nodded, “Yes Ma’am. I understand. And my report will be on your desk in an hour.”

The Lieutenant Colonel nodded, did an about turn, and walked off.

Evans smiled, “Well, Ma’am. I guess we will have to be more professional Ma’am. Might I assist you with your report Ma’am?”

“No Lance Corporal, I have tasked Lieutenant Gates with preparing the report. Since, as a poor peasant farmer, I would not expect you to know how to read. And kneel when I’m talking to you. Also kiss my hand.”

Evans snapped, “HA! I’m not allowed to touch you. I win Cap.”

“You have got me there Corp,” She laughed, “I am really excited about tomorrow. Just think about how romantic that would be? I go off to war and meet my husband, a handsome young nobleman. The newspapers would go crazy.”

“Can you imagine what’s going to happen when you get pregnant Cap? That would probably frontpage news for all nine months.”

“Good thing I will not have to worry about that for a while. It will probably the hardest battle I will ever have to face. And I will not even have you to help.”

“What do you mean I won’t be able to help you Cap? I’ll follow you to the end of the world. Especially if the end of the world means shooing reporters. And I’m sure Anna will help too. She’s feisty.”

Captain Kestel smiled, “If you are serious, I could probably find someone on my staff after the war for you.”

“Well, if we both survive this war, I might just have to take you up on that. I’m pretty sure Anna would hate my other plan of moving back to Halton and farming,” Evans laughed, “Being the wife of a poor farmer or being able to see her favorite celebrity every day. I wonder which she’ll choose.”

“I keep hearing about Anna, and I still have not met her.”

“Well, I’m pretty sure meeting you will be like what happens whenever anyone else meets you. Except, since she isn’t military, she won’t get excited to me and then pretend to be normal around you.”

“Do people really act different when I am not there?”

Evans nodded, “Once, when you were sleeping, I got a runner from Battalion, and she asked if she could have some of your hair. And I’ve heard a lot worse than that Cap.”

“James,” Captain Kestel shrugged, “Never tell me about those things.”

“Is that an order Cap?”

“Yes Evans. Yes it is.”

 

Interlude

The 28th of April. Evans was coming home. It had been several long months since the last time he had seen Anna. All the way back in November. Oddly enough, he had consistently received letters from her during his time at the front, but as soon as they had entered the months of offensive training far into Western Ethslin, the letters had halted. Something about secrecy. He laughed a bit. Nine months since he had married Anna, and he had barely spent any time with her.

The Taxi pulled to a halt in front of the apartment complex. Evans reached for his money, but the driver shook his head, “No, Thank you for service.”

Evans smiled, opened the door, and started to drag his kit bag out of the back seat when the front door of the apartment complex burst open. Anna burst out, looking significantly larger than Evans remembered her. She pushed Evans back into the Taxi, sat down, pointed at the taxi driver, and shouted, “Hospital Now!”

As the Taxi pulled out, she grabbed Evans’ face and kissed him, “Good Timing James.”

“Wait, Why are we going to the Hospital?”

“Remember? Like, nine months ago?”

It slowly dawned on Evans, “Wait, if the Baby is coming now, we should go back home!”

“We’re not farmers James! Real people are born in hospitals!”

“Wait, I’m a farmer and was born in a barn, am I not a real person?” He paused. His eyes widened, “Oh My God, We’re having a baby!”

This idiotic shouting match continued until the taxi arrived at the hospital.

 

Evans waited impatiently outside the room. He kept hearing screaming, but he couldn’t do anything. After what felt like forever, a Nurse opened the door. She looked at him, “You can come in now Mister Evans.”

He smiled and pushed past her. He looked at the bed where Anna lay. She was smiling, holding a bundle of blankets.

Anna looked up at him. She turned the bundle towards him and squeaked, “It’s a girl! We made a little girl!”

Grabbing the little bundle, Evans kissed her head. He then looked at Anna, “What do we want to name it?”

“Mary. Her name will be Mary,” She smiled absent mindedly, “You can name the next one.”

Evans kissed Anna on the forehead, “Well I’ve got leave in two months on the 28th of June. We can make one then.”

 

Digging Party

“So Corp, we’ve never really talked. I’m sorry, what is your name?” Evans was standing with Sergeant Gabriel’s Corporal watching the Team’s Lance Corporals and Privates digging out the dugout. Sergeant Gabriel had gone to talk with the other Sergeants.

The Corporal smirked. “Corporal Canina, but you can just call me Alida. And you’re Jim Evans, right?”

Evans nodded, then screwed up his face, “Wait, Alida Canina? That’s your name?” He laughed, “Alida Canina. Sorry.”

“I get that a lot. When my Husband proposed to me, he said, ‘Alida Hewitt, want ditch Hewitt and have the dumbest sounding name in the world?’ I can tell you one thing, my kids will not have any ‘i’ sounds in their names.”

“That’s why I have a nice, boring name like Evans, planning ahead. And I even saved my wife, her last name was Zakrzewska. That name is impossible to pronounce,” Evans pulled out his shovel, “I’m gonna go make some quick wall scrapes for the Captain, Boswell, and I.”

“Right. You want a little help? I’m a little bored watching the excavation.”

“Alright Alida Canina. Cap’s a bit short, so she can deal with a pretty small one,” Evans knelt and started hacking at the frozen wall of the shellhole. Canina got down next to him and joined in. After about half an hour of hard work, they had excavated barely enough space for the Captain to sleep in. The two stepped back to look on the progress of the rest of the party when the Captain walked in.

She walked over to Evans, “So how’s the progress on my dugout James?”

Evans looked over, “Looks like you’ll be sleeping in a scrape today.

“Very well, I think I will be turning in now, Wake me when Lieutenant Gates has a proper report, right lad?”

“Yes Ma’am.”

“And if you clear the dugout wake me.”

Evans snapped his fingers, “Oh yes, Cap… I could procure a blanket for you if you need one. Sleeping on the surface can be quite cold Ma’am.”

“Be quick about it James.”

“Righto Ma’am,” Evans tucked his shovel into his belt and walked down the line looking for any blankets. He eventually found a wall scrape that had a tattered blanket hanging down. He ripped it off and wadded it up. A soldier inside started to whine.

Evans rolled his eyes, “Fuck off, this is going to an officer.”

The soldier sat up, fluffed her hair, and sarcastically said, “But is this officer as pretty as I?”

“It’s Lady Demetria of Medway.”

The soldier snapped her fingers, “Damn. I can’t top that. I guess I should feel honored. A noblewoman is stealing my curtain.” She paused a moment, “Wait, Lady Demetria is here? Like nearby?” The soldier stepped out, “Can I… uh, go with you to… Make sure this gets to uh… Her Grace?”

Evans shook his head, “No, she gets really annoyed at this. She is just Lady Demetria now. She isn’t called Her Grace until she actually becomes Duchess. Apparently there are a bunch of really weird rules for talking to her.”

“Is that a yes then?”

“Sure, whatever. Fine.”

She smiled, “Best day ever. She’s my hero.”

Evans rolled his eyes, “Ugh. So, what’s your name?”

“Private Pollard. My friends call me Polly.”

“Alright Pollard, with me. And I’m Lance Corporal Evans.”

The two then walked back to the section of line where Captain Kestel was in. She was lying down, attempting to sleep when Evans tapped her on the shoulder. She rolled to face him, “What Lance? Got a Blanket.”

Polly smiled and held it up, “It’s my blanket Lady. I’m so honored to meet you. I’m Ann. Polly. I mean Private Pollard Ma’am”

The Captain nodded, “Thank you very much Private Pollard. I will return this if I am able.” She scribbled a quick note into her notebook, ripped it out, and handed it to Evans, “Give this to her commanding officer.”

“Yes Cap,” Evans stuffed the paper into his pocket and looked to Pollard, “Can you show me where your officer is?”

She nodded and started walking, “It is a bit weird with him though, I’m temporarily attached to the Miner’s as a security detail, so we might have to go underground to find him.”

“Right, At least we’ll be out of the rain, eh?” Evans gestured back to the recent shell hole.

“Yes indeed. I would rather be in your company though, under the command of Lady Demetria.”

Evans shrugged, “Eh, sometimes, I have to deal with annoying people who treat my officer like an animal at a zoo.”

Polly mocked him a little then pointed to the entrance to a tunnel, “Here we go. We need to find a Captain Stoddart. He’s a bit crazy, but he’s a good officer.”

Evans paused, “Wait, Winston Stoddart the Third?”

“Yeah? You know him?”

“He was my platoon leader before Captain Kestel. And he’s a good officer now?”

“Yeah, He really knows a lot about mining and really passionate about rocks. Sometimes, during our special meetings, we won’t even do anything, he’ll just talk about the different rocks he encountered while mining. Plus there’s this weird thing called Uniformi… something. And that is wrong according to him? It’s all really complicated.”

“Uniformitarianism is not wrong, it is just flawed Polly. Everyone treats it like gradualism is the only way, while I am here, digging through what is obviously evidence that Catastrophism is somewhat right. Now of course in a few weeks it will all be blown to Hell. Which is of course even more evidence that Geology happens fast sometimes. I’m about to make a huge crater that would take erosion untold millennia to make. I did most of my research out here until my Professor told me to knock it off and not make waves,” Captain Stoddart paused and stared at Evans for a few seconds, “Private Evans?”

“Lance Corporal Evans Sir. I have a message from Captain Kestel regarding Private Pollard’s blanket Sir. Captain Kestel has requisitioned it for her purposes while her dugout is being excavated, and, it will be returned as soon as possible,” Evans held out the piece of paper to Captain Stoddart, “Here it is Sir, signed by the Captain herself.”

“Very Well Lance Corporal,” He smiled, “I should like to meet her sometime, her families land has some interesting structures from the Carboniferous that I have wanted to look at.”

“Right Sir, Am I dismissed?”

“Yes Lance Corporal,” Captain Stoddart gestured to Private Pollard, “Now that your up Polly, I need to talk about something.”

Change Over

“I’ll take this up, right Ma’am?” Evans hoisted the Captain’s Kit Bag onto his shoulder.

Nodding, She finished up the handing over checklist, “Yes James, and make sure Lieutenant Gates does a proper takeover, I do not want arrive only to find that we have no shovels or something.”

“Very Well Captain,” He walked up the stairs and made his way down the line. Luckily, the shelling was rather light that night flares weren’t even doing their normal criss cross, and Evans could see the stars in the sky. He was jealous of those lucky bastards coming off the line through the underground sap though. No chance of snipers or machine guns. And unless they got a direct hit, no problem from artillery. At least those fuckers didn’t get to see the stars. He did wish he could smoke right now. Nothing better than smoking on a cold night looking at the stars. Stupid artillery spotters.

It took a few minutes, but he found the dugout. Evans walked down the stairs and set down Captain Kestel’s bag. He saluted the Captain in the dugout, “Sir.”

“You from the 202nd lad?”

“Yes Captain, is Lieutenant Gates not here yet?”

“No lad, you mind popping out to look for him? He was supposed to be here a few minutes ago,” The Captain tapped his clipboard, “And this takes a bit of time.”

Evans nodded, “Alright Captain. Mind if I leave Captain Kestel’s bag here?”

“That’s fine lad. Now go get that Gates fellow. I am Captain Thompson by the way.”

Evans ran back up the stairs and started to track down the Lieutenant. He ran back up towards Fox Company and looked around for anyone in First Platoon. How the Hell was he supposed to find the Lieutenant? These were confusing enough as is without having to look for someone.

He eventually found a Sergeant from First Platoon, “Sergeant, do you know where Lieutenant Gates is?”

“Isn’t he at the new position?” She screwed up her face, “The Lady told him to get down there. Wait, aren’t you her kid?”

“I’m her assistant, yes. And Lieutenant Gates is a bit lost. Or dead.”

“Hope he isn’t dead, we’re starting to get a reputation for losing officers. Shit, it will be really bad when the Lady kicks it.”

Shrugging, Evans ran back through the communication trenches until he saw a Lieutenant looking at a map, “Sir!”

“Evans?” Lieutenant Gates folded his map and put it away, “Would you happen to know where I am supposed to be?”

“Yes Lieutenant, the Captain you have a meeting with sent me.”

“Damn, this is so embarrassing, can you not tell the Lady about us?”

Evans gestured towards the second line, “Shall we Lieutenant?”

“Alright Lance, Thank you very much.”

The two started walking down the communications trench. The artillery started to get heavier, so Evans started to crouch lower. They approached Captain Thompson’s dugout. A quiet whistle started to come over the rest of the artillery. Evans turned around and dived onto Lieutenant Gates.

There was a deafening roar followed seconds later by a shower of dirt and timber.

The Lieutenant laughed, “A bit forward, but it is nice to know someone else shares my view on romance. Now, take me to that meeting.”

Evans got stood up and shook the dirt off of him. He then extended his hand and helped up the Lieutenant. When he walked around the corner to Captain Thompson’s dugout, it was gone. That whole section of line had been replaced with a large crater.

“Oh fuck,” Evans pulled out his shovel, ran to where the entrance was and started to dig. Lieutenant Gates ran up next to him and started throwing pieces of timber out of the crater.

Another Lieutenant ran in, “Dan! Dan! Fuck! You There! Sergeant! I need a team here! Now! Captain Thompson’s dugout has been hit!”

Lieutenant Gates stepped back when the team came in to start digging. They kept digging until Evans hit something squishy. Rubbery. Not again. He felt the revulsion from that first week in the trenches those long months before.

Stumbling backwards, Evans started to vomit. The team dragged out what was left of Captain Thompson’s body. Lieutenant Gates helped Evans up, “Tell Captain Kestel that Captain Thompson and the dugout have been blown asunder.”

“Yes… Sir? What does asunder mean?”

“It means apart. What are you, a farmer?”

“Yes sir I am sir.”

Lieutenant Gates nodded, “Right, I forget sometimes. Tell her I am doing the hand over with one of their surviving Lieutenants.”

“Yes Sir,” Evans ran back up to Captain Kestel’s dugout. He ran down to the bottom and saluted. The Captain looked away from the incoming Lieutenant and saluted.

“What do you need Lance?”

“Lieutenant Gates sent me. Captain Thompson was killed before we could talk to him. He is talking to one of the surviving Lieutenants. Your kit bag was also lost Ma’am. The dugout was ‘Blown Asunder’”

“I guess Gates was the one used that term, but very well, get Sergeant Gabriel’s team to try and dig it out again. Also, build me a wall scrape just in case.”

Raid

The party was gathered at the end of the sap. Captain Kestel was looking at her watch. Evans looked at the pistol in his left hand. He slid it back into its holster and hefted the trench club. Hopefully he wouldn’t have to use either. He felt a tap on his shoulder. He looked up and Captain Kestel nodded. He turned around and tapped Corporal Giuliano on the shoulder. She turned and continued the chain.

Shells started to rain down on the Vledscan line. Three quarters explosive, the rest smoke. Distracting machine gun fire opened up to the right, hopefully drawing the attention of any Vledscan soldiers on watch. Two flares went up a bit further down the line to add to the confusion

The Captain then disappeared over the edge of the sap. Evans quickly followed. Slowly the party worked their way towards the bunker, dashing from shell hole to shell hole. They got halfway there when the Captain stopped. She looked back and whispered, “Long flat up ahead. About ten meters. Evans first, Lewis second, Tiscornia third, Giuliano fourth, Riley Fifth. The rest of us will stay here and provide fire if need be. You have all the equipment, so you should be able to set the charges in place. Move.”

Taking a deep breath, Evans drew his pistol. He wasn’t really sure why. It wouldn’t help him in any way. He scrambled over the top and sprinted as fast as he could. He dove down and took a deep breath. Lewis dropped in behind him with the bag of explosives. Tiscornia came across with the wire and smiled. There was a burst of machine gun fire and Giuliano tumbled in.

Tiscornia’s eyes widened, “Marie? Marie?”

“Ow. That hurt a bit.” Giuliano stared blankly at the stars

Riley dove in next with the blasting machine, “Oh shit.”

Lewis started to pat down Giuliano, “She’s hit in the chest. Very Bad.”

“She’ll be alright?” Tiscornia leaned next to Lewis.

“I do not know.”

“Dom?” Giuliano stared through Tiscornia, “I love you.”

Tiscornia snapped, “Lewis, you’re a pastor. Can you marry us?”

“What?”

“Marie, will you marry me?”

“Of course. You might be a widow soon though.”

Lewis looked at the two, “I can do this quickly. Riley, can you try and patch up the Corporal?”

“Alright Pastor,” Riley put down the machine and started to apply gauze to Giuliano’s wounds.

“Lance Corporal. I mean Dominic. Do you take this woman to be your wife?”

“Yes.”

“Marie, do you take this man to be your husband?”

“I do.”

“I know pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the bride.”

Tiscornia bent over and kissed Giuliano. He then grabbed the bag of explosives and plugged one end of the wire in. With a quick motion, he drew the pistol from Giuliano’s holster, “I’ll be borrowing this honey.”

Hefting the bag, he rolled over the top.

There was a beat.

Evans blinked.

“Oh Fuck,” Evans poked his head over the edge of the shellhole. Tiscornia was running as fast as he could while trailing the wire behind him. Evans saw the Tiscornia disappear into the bunker and heard four muffled gunshots.

A few seconds later, Tiscornia emerged from the bunker and sprinted low. He tumbled over as a bullet caught him in the leg. Tiscornia then dragged himself slowly towards the shellhole and rolled in. He looked at Giuliano, “You’re right, bullets hurt.”

Giuliano coughed, “I told you so. Riley. Do it quickly.”

Riley nodded and connected the end of the wire to the blasting machine. She raised up the plunger and slammed it back down. An explosion ripped through the air.

Evans poked his head back up. The bunker had been ripped apart. Machine guns from both sides started to strafe back and forth over the bunker.

Giuliano spoke up, her voice slowly getting softer, “Riley and Lewis, Help Dom run along. Evans, I am afraid that I can’t really walk right now, so can you carry me?”

“Yes Corp.”

“Right. Riley and Lewis, move out now. Evans and I will join you in a moment.”

The two Privates nodded and put Tiscornia’s arms over their shoulders and ran across. The machine guns didn’t seem to notice them. Evans bent down to pick up Giuliano. The warmth of her blood was somewhat of a surprise to Evans as it trickled down the back of his neck. He then stumbled as fast as he could towards the shellhole the Captain was in. He slid into the hole and looked around.

Rifle grenades started to fall nearby. Captain Kestel drew her pistol, “I’ll provide cover with my pistol. Fall back to the sap. I’ll come back once this fire dies down.”

Evans put the Corporal down slowly, “Ma’am. I should stay with you.”

“If you insist James. Nazarri, take the Corporal with you,” She shrugged, and pulled a cylinder out of her greatcoat, “I’ve got one smoke. Evans, want to toss it?”

“Yes Ma’am,” Evans grabbed the grenade and pulled the pin. He ran up the edge of the shellhole and threw it onto what looked like an open flat. It shot out and slowly billowed. He waited for the rifle team to leave and then pulled his pistol and fired it wildly towards the Vledscan line. The Captain joined him and they fired until empty. The machine guns focused on the pair, while the rifle team escaped unmolested.

Three white flairs went up and rifle grenades started to rain down. The Captain and Evans slid down to the bottom of the shellhole and waited. After about an hour, the fire died down. The Captain looked at Evans, “Shall we?”

“Alright Cap. To the sap?”

“To the sap,” She climbed to the edge, “Last one there is a rotten egg.” She then vaulted over and started sprinting. Evans followed a few seconds later and ran as fast as he could machine gun fire started to whiz past. Shrugging, he drew his pistol and fired blindly as he ran. A bullet slammed into the pistol and shot it out of his hand. “Holy Fuck!” He kept running. He eventually slid into the sap moments after the Captain. He stared at her and burst out laughing, “Shit that was a rush. I did lose the pistol though.”

The Captain put on a serious face, “You dare use that language in the presence of a Lady?” She laughed, “Let us head back James.”

“Yeah, le…” Evans paused and listened, there was a whistle. Evans knocked the Captain to the ground and attempted to cover her with his body as much as possible. The shell burst and Evans felt a few impacts onto his back. He patted his back, feeling where shrapnel had embedded in his haversack. He looked into the Captain’s face, her eyes, which were centimeters from his, twinkling under the light of the flares. He whispered, “You alright Captain?”

She smiled, “No, there is this guy on top of me and he’s really heavy.” The Captain laughed, “Also, I think you pushed me onto some barbed wire.”

“Sorry Cap,” He nodded towards the newly formed shell hole, “That was one of ours that fell short. We should wait a bit in case they haven’t adjusted their range.”

The Captain looked at him, accidentally hitting his nose with hers, “Can you move then James?”

“I’d rather have a shell hit you than me Cap. All the other Orderlies will make fun of me if I get you killed,” He bit the air in front of her face, “Ooh, if I kill you, will I become a Duke?”

“Ugh, You should know this. One, I am not the Duchess yet, and two, if I was, that is not how titles pass down. Think, if I killed you, would I become a poor peasant farmer?”

“Damn, it would have been a cool surprise for Anna, ‘Hey Honey, I’m home on leave, also, I am now the Duke of Medway.’”

Another Ethslin shell burst nearby. The Captain craned her head back to see where it hit, “Back in the good old days, I could have you beheaded for all this. You tackled me, you refused to let me up, and now this talk of assassination. Actually, I might be able to get you executed if I really push it.”

Evans shrugged, “I think they’re done Ma’am. Let’s scram.”

Back in the Trenches

The trenches in the Northern Regions were very different than the ones at White Beach. They were much deeper, having been continuously improved since the beginning of the war. Most of the artillery guns were buried in deep concrete bunkers. There was also a much more rigid structure for advancement to the front. An Infantry Regiment would come in to the rear line, where the 202nd was now. It would spend a week there, going on any raids necessary, and resting in the relative safety. The next week would be in the fall-back line, with the job of repairing the wire. Finally, the third week would be in the front line trenches. Their job was too watch, hope, and pray. This line rarely got any sleep, due to the near constant machine gun, rifle, and artillery fire.

These trenches felt much safer to Evans. It didn’t hurt that the front line was a few hundred meters forward. He snaked his way past the signs, looking for “Smithies Hole,” the trench where Second Platoon was. He wondered who Smithie was. And why this was their hole? Was it innuendo? Probably. Would Newey make a joke about it? Definitely.

Once Evans found it, he walked into the Lieutenant’s dugout and saluted, “Sir! Message from the Captain!”

“Um… Yes. Very well Lance Corporal… What is it?”

“A Raid Sir. Captain Kestel will be leading, and she wants to use Sergeant Chilcott’s team.”

“Thanks for telling me Lance Corporal. Um… You are excused?”

“Very well Sir,” Evans did an about face and left the dugout. He walked to one of the soldiers on watch and tapped them on the shoulder.

Kempe turned around, “Evans, need something?”

“Yeah, do you know where Chilly is?”

She pointed at one of the dugouts, “I think he’s in their. See you around.”

“See ya,” Evans walked into the dugout Kempe had pointed at. It was much less nice than the officers’ dugouts. Less deep too. He picked up a candle by the entrance and walked in, casting the flickering light on the various cots until he found Sergeant Chilcott.

Sergeant Chilcott was attempting to sleep.

“Chilly” Evans whispered.

The Sergeant let out a thin, slow, “Fuuuuuuuuckkkkkkk” and opened his eyes, “What is it Evans?”

“Captain sent me. She wants your team on a raid tomorrow. You should meet with her after stand to for details.”

“Dammit,” Chilcott rolled over, “I hate doing things.”

“See you later Chilly,” Evans walked to the entrance and put the candle back in place. He left the dugout and walked down towards the exit. There was a rustle in one of the wall scrapes, a smaller dugout for two or three soldiers covered by a curtain. Tiscornia rolled out, stood up and brushed off his uniform. Giuliano slowly scooted out a few seconds later and stood up.

A flare went up and Evans waved, “Hey Dom and Corp.” He paused a moment, “Um… Corp, your, ah, fly is undone.”

She blushed, “Dom, broke one of the buttons off.”

Tiscornia interrupted, “Yes, while we were sitting and doing platonic things with each other.”

Laughing, Evans walked past them, “I’ve gotta go stare at the front lines. Corp, don’t let Dom get you platonically pregnant while I’m gone.”

He then wandered his way to the front line. It was somewhat quiet tonight, much less artillery than usual. Flares only were coming up every few minutes. Evans quickly patted his pockets to check if his periscope and notepad were there. They were.

127th Infantry Headquarters was somewhat quiet. Evans walked into the deep headquarters dugout and saluted the first officer he saw, “Sir, I’m here from the 202nd to check out the bunker before tomorrows raid.”

The Captain nodded, “You’ll be Lady Demetria’s assistant then?”

“Yes sir.”

“Well, I guess I will show you to the position lad,” The Captain put his helmet and greatcoat then walked towards the entrance.

“Thank you Captain.”

“Sorry, not Captain. I was promoted about a week ago have not had time to put on my new tags,” The Major gestured to the insignia on his helmet, “At least I still have the Captain target.”

“Yes sir.”

The Major then led Evans through the trenches to a listening sap. The two crouched low and walked to the middle of No-Man’s Land. A few shells dropped nearby, and a green flare lingered a few hundred meters down the line. Once they got to the end of the sap, the major pointed to a small bulge in the ground about sixty meters away. He whispered into Evans’ ear, “It’s well hidden in there. It has a machine gun facing the opposite end, facing down two companies worth of trench. The last attempt got hit by a machine gun,” the major turned and pointed towards the Vledscan line, “There. So you will have to watch that.” He gestured to a few other locations, “As far as we can tell, there are more machine guns there.”

Evans frantically drew out the positions in his notebook as best he could in the low light.

The Major shrugged, “That’s about it.” He reached into his pocket and fired a red flare. A burst of rifle and machine gun fire opened up about a hundred meters down the line. The Major smirked at Evans, “That’s for the party coming up. They will be extending the sap a little closer to the nest. We will try and do something to draw the fire a little tomorrow night. But, you can use it a little to get a better look.”

“Yes sir. Thank you sir,” Evans stood up a little to get a better look at the bunker. It was sunk somewhat low in the dirt. He could see a few scars where artillery gunners had fired a failed direct hit. He could make out a little sap that made it’s way to what Evans presumed was the entrance to the bunker. He noted it on his drawing.

A flare went up nearby. Before he had a chance to duck, Evans noticed about four members of the previous party, torn to shreds by a machine gun. He ducked down to avoid joining them.

The Major then waved him back and the two walked back down the sap to the main trench. They passed six soldiers with picks and shovels. They worked their way back to the dugout. The Major took off his greatcoat and helmet, “Righto, stop by before you kick off tomorrow night.”

“Yes Sir.”

Dugout

Evans brushed the snow off of his uniform. Once he was relatively clean, he walked downstairs into the deep dugout. He saw Captain Kestel in the candlelight, making notes on her map. She looked up, “He… Hey… Ja… James. How is the wea… weather up there?”

He smiled, “I just checked my watch Cap. It’s midnight. Happy Birthday.”

She laughed as a shell burst overhead, shaking the dugout, “Ha… Happy birthday to you too James.”

Evans grabbed a blanket and tossed it to her. She caught it and wrapped it around herself, “You know what I did for my birthday last year?”

“I don’t really follow the tabloids Cap.”

Standing up, the Captain acted as if her blanket was a dress, “Huge party. I wore the most beautiful dress. I should show it to you sometime. I danced most of the night. The feast was amazing, and the cake was exquisite. When the time for presents came, I revealed to my parents that I intended to join the army.”

“What kind of presents did you get Cap?”

“Well, my favorite one was a new horse. My older horse I had gotten when I was twelve, and she was way to small for me. Next… Ooh, I got this most beautiful golden necklace that went amazingly with my dress. Then of course a few new dresses, a few books for my collection. You know normal stuff. And, two of the gentlemen I danced with proposed to me,” The Captain smiled, “I turned them down of course, but you know how that is.”

“I must say Cap, I do not think that is normal gifts, and I have never experienced multiple people proposing to me on the same night,” Evans laughed, “Last year for my birthday I got a book.” He sighed, “Also, that list of gifts make my present look really bad.” Pulling an envelope out of his pocket, he extended it to the Captain, “Happy Birthday?”

Laughing, she accepted the envelope and opened it up. Inside there were several folded paper animals, “You probably put more effort into these than most of my gifts last year, and at least I can carry these with me. You know how hard it is to wear a frilly red dress into combat?”

The Captain then reached into her desk and pulled out a gift wrapped in brown paper, “Now, I did not really know what kind of things poor people would buy each other, but I did notice the Bernard Sharpe book in your kit during inspection last month.”

She handed the gift to Evans and he opened it up. Captain Kestel smiled, “He’s a family friend, so I sent a telegram to him, and he sent me one of his manuscripts.”

“Wait,” Evans looked through it, “Holy Shit Ma’am. I’m pretty sure this is worth more than everything I own. Um… Wow… Thank you.” Evans carefully wrapped some paper around the gift and placed it into his kit underneath the Officer’s Assistant cot. He worked on a letter while the Captain went back to her paperwork.

After about half an hour, Captain Simmons walked down the steps, “Good Night Lady.” He paused, “It still feels weird using that as a greeting.” He took off his helmet and greatcoat, then walked to Captain Kestel’s desk. She walked up to him and extended her hand. Captain Simmons accepted the handshake and sat down. Captain Kestel followed suit. “Plus, it’s weird that your promotion to Captain went through before mine to Major. Ah well.”

“What do I owe the pleasure of this visit Captain Simmons?”

Captain Simmons pulled a stylus out of his pocket and tapped it on the map, “Boxer’s have set up a bunker here. Don’t ask me how we missed it, but it happened. The machine gun there enfilades a large part of the line over by the 127th. We’ve tried shelling the area, but we can’t seem to get accurate fire on it. Thanks to your actions at Urbs, Fox has been re-designated as Shock troops in the official books, and as such, when the General was told he needed someone to take it out, he specifically asked for you. The horrors of competence Eh?”

He sat back in his chair while Captain Kestel circled the bunker. “It goes down tomorrow morning at One. The team should meet at Regimental HQ an hour beforehand. Arty is going to fire a quick barrage of smoke shells, so, every single Vledscan Machine gun will be firing on that position. You’ll be given a pack of explosives, fifty meters of wire, and a blasting machine. Since this is your first time in charge a raid, I could give you some advice.”

“Yes Captain. That would be very much appreciated.”

“Well, I’d recommend sending one rifle team, along with an officer, and a runner. No rifles, a pistol for the officer, Sergeant, Corporal, and Runner. These should only be used as a last resort, because the Vledscan’s will open up on you. Everyone should have shovels, clubs, and bayonets. Politically, I’d recommend going yourself, since there are a lot of officers who think that Urbs was a pushover, and trench raids are where real officers are born. Speaking of officers, if you can take one prisoner, do it. Try not to disembowel them this time,” He laughed, “And stay low. If a flare goes up, close one eye and freeze. Try darkening your face with mud before hand.” He tapped his hand, “Right, and sense the smoke shells are a beacon to gunfire, move fast. Once it goes up though, it might be wise to stay in cover for a while to give the fire some time to cool off. Unless the Boxers fire rifle grenades at you, then run like Hell. Most importantly, get some good sleep today. Got it?”

“Yes Captain. Thank you.”

“Righto,” Captain Simmons looked at his watch, “Well, I’ll be off now.” He stood up, put on his helmet and greatcoat, and left the dugout.

Captain Kestel looked at Evans, “So, want to have a bit of fun tomorrow night?”

“I’m always looking for an opportunity to give Anna one of those lifetime dead spouse pensions Cap.”

“Good lad,” She paused, “Privates Lewis and Riley have experience with explosives right?”

“Yes Cap. And they are in Sergeant Chilcott’s team.”

“Very well, wake Boswell and have her inform Lieutenant Windsor and Sergeant Chilcott of the raid. Windsor might have to rework the watch schedules to allow the team some sleep. Then have her go down to the 127th and sketch the bunker.”

“I can do it Cap.”

“Alright James, we can let Boswell have some sleep for a little longer.”

Pack Inspection

“Ma’am, your tea,” Evans held the cup out to Lieutenant Kestel, “And I have some good news Ma’am.”

The Lieutenant grabbed the cup and took a sip, “Thanks, and what is it Evans?”

“I’ve been talking with the other runners Ma’am, and rumor is, Captain Simmons is being promoted up to Battalion, and they’re giving you the company.”

She nodded, “I somewhat expected that. Because otherwise we would have to bring in someone else, and, well, they want to make me happy, because they want to make my father happy.”

“Well congratulations… Future Captain.”

“Thank you… Lance Corporal?” She shrugged, “Well, I guess your rank will now make more sense. Who ever heard of a Lieutenant with a Lance as a runner? Now, on to business.” She picked up a folder, “Surprise Pack inspection. Muster everyone full kit on the parade grounds fifteen minutes.”

“Yes Ma’am,” Evans ran into each Platoon’s tent and rang the bell, “Muster! Full Kit! Ten Minutes!”

He then ran back to the Lieutenant’s tent, “They’re mustering Ma’am.” He picked up his clipboard and his kit. Evans then followed the Lieutenant outside to the parade ground and took her position at the head of the company. Evans stood at attention next to her. The Lieutenant shouted, “Company Atten… Tion!”

The company quickly adjusted to attention.

“Open Order… March!”

Second and Third platoons adjusted to Open Order. First Platoon, with only one Squad of soldiers, stayed in place.

“Right… Dress!”

The Platoons adjusted to their order.

“Alright! If You Have Not Guessed, We Are Having A Pack Inspection!” The Lieutenant grabbed Evans pack and rifled through it. She found his book and flipped through the pages, “Good Evans.”

Evans put down his pack, pulled out his pen, and looked at the clipboard. The Lieutenant started walking towards First Platoon. The inspection got part way through First Platoon with only two alcohol violations. The problem came at the fifth soldier. She pulled a book out of the bag and started to look through it. The private looked nervous, “You don’t need to look through it Ma’am.”

“Write him down, talking out of turn. Private Sau…” Her face went white. She then started yelling, “WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS! DROP RIGHT NOW AND DO NOT FUCKING STOP PUSH UPS UNTIL I FUCKING TELL YOU.”

She walked to the front of the formation, “ALRIGHT! PRIVATE SAUNDERS THERE THINKS IT IS APPROPRIATE TO HAVE…” She flipped through the papers with a look of scorn, “A SERIES OF DRAWINGS OF ME HAVING MARRIED TIMES! IF ANY OTHERS OF YOU HAVE COPIES OF THIS, TURN THEM IN NOW. IF YOU DO NOT, I WILL FIND THEM, AND YOU WILL BE PUNISHED VERY FUCKING SEVERELY.”

The Lieutenant walked back to Private Saunders, “WHERE THE FUCK DID YOU GET THESE?”

The Private paused his push ups for a moment, “I bought it in Strongfield Ma’am. On Leave.”

“Did I Tell You To Stop Doing Push Ups Private?” She walked back out and stared at the company, “Anyone else bought this garbage?”

Three privates stepped forward. The Lieutenant yelled at them, had them start push ups, and ripped through the companies packs. Once she was finished, she let the four privates recover. She assigned a Corporal to them, and ordered them exercise for the next four hours.

The Lieutenant dismissed the company and went back to her tent. Evans picked up his kit and followed. When he got back, the Lieutenant was crying in the corner.

Evans dropped his kit and knelt next to her, “Are you OK Ma’am?”

“I just feel so… Ew… Start the stove for a shower…” She stood up and held out the drawings, “Burn these with it James. Once it’s started… Leave. I want to be alone.”

“Yes Ma’am,” Evans grabbed the drawings and folded them. He turned around and paused for a second, turned back and hugged the Lieutenant, “Sorry if this is against regulations.” He then turned around and walked to the shower’s stove. He built a log cabin and shredded the drawings in his hands. After a moment, he placed them in the center and grabbed the slowmatch. He tended the fire until it had flared up to a reasonable amount. He stacked the extra wood on top of the stove and shut the door. He then tapped the side of the water tank, “It’s pretty full Ma’am. I’d say an hour or two of water.”

Evans walked out the room. The shower started up. He walked to Second Platoon’s tent. After a pause, he walked in and to Team 3’s room. Sergeant Chilcott was doing paperwork with Giuliano and Tiscornia. Chilly looked up, “Hey Evans. How’s the high life?”

“Can I ask a favor?”

Chilly looked at Tiscornia, “No one makes social calls these days. It’s this generation. Too focused on work.”

“I know what you’re talking about Chilly. Ever since telegraphs got cheap, kids just expect everything to be done right away,” Tiscornia looked at Evans, “So, what do you want Evans?”

“It’s about the Lieutenant…” He paused, “She’s… well. Very shaken up about what happened at inspection today. When I got to the tent, she was collapsed in the corner.”

“So you want teach them a lesson?”

Giuliano put down her pen, “I’m in.”

Tiscornia nodded , “Me too. Ustinov, Newey, and Cain will probably agree. Nazarri too. Maybe Hardin. Chilly, can you keep watch? Since you’re a Sergeant, people will do what you say.” Tiscornia looked at Giuliano, “Tell the Corporal in charge of the punishment detail that the Lieutenant ordered you to take over. The rest of us will find a nice empty tent to take them to. Evans will be smoking outside it. It will be a battalion headquarters tent from where the 125th was staying.”

It took about half an hour, but the group was assembled at the empty tent. They cleared out a back room. Evans walked outside and lit a cigarette. Eventually Giuliano jogged into view, with the four soldiers behind her, all exhausted. Evans stepped out in front of the group, “Hey, LT needs this tent cleaned. Congratulations on being the randomly selected detail.” He blew some smoke in one of their faces. Turning to Giuliano, he smiled, “You can take off early Corp.”

The soldiers walked inside. Evans waited a second and followed, “Back room. Supplies are in there.”

When they walked in, Evans picked up a sock filled with soap.

Half an hour later, and the group left. They left the privates inside the tent.

At Evening muster, the Lieutenant gave a long talk about not fighting other soldiers. Afterward, she called Evans back to her tent. She frowned, “If you ever do that again…” Changing her tone, she hugged him, “Thanks. You are a good… person.” She looked down, “A good friend. There. I said it. Now do not tell anyone I said it or else.”

Torture

Evans put the little stove on the counter top and started it. Once he got a suitable flame going, he drew the bayonet Lieutenant Kestel had given him and balanced it on the stove. Next, he turned around and moved the heavy chair to the middle of the room. He dragged a table to it’s feet and started placing the tools: A sharpened piece of rebar, some copper wire, a lighter, a lot of rope, a gag, some cotton swatches, and the bucket of water.

He looked at his watch. Just in time. He walked over and opened the door. Lance Corporal Tiscornia and Private Head were dragging the bruised Sergeant Knowles along. They sat him down in the chair and secured him. Tiscornia waved and left the room.

Evans quickly secured the gag before Lieutenant Kestel walked in. She slowly walked around the chair while staring at the Sergeant. She pointed at Evans, “Wake him up.”

Nodding, Evans picked up the bucket and tossed the water in Sergeant Knowles’ face, startling him into consciousness.

Lieutenant Kestel smiled at him, “Sergeant, we know about you. We talked to Boswell. We read Claybrooks’ journal. The other sergeants. We know everything. You are going to die. Slowly.” She picked up the piece of rebar and slowly poked it into the Sergeant’s shoulder. The Lieutenant then looked to Evans, “See, that’s just boring. Sure he’s in pain, but it’s expected.” She then took the lighter and copper wire, “This way is more fun.” She stuck one end of the wire underneath the Sergeant’s fingernail and put the lighter underneath the other end.

Evans watched the Sergeant’s eyes, which were weeping. They slowly got wider as the pain set in. After thirty seconds, the Lieutenant dropped the lighter, “Still boring. But.” She pointed to Sergeant Knowles’ groin, “Evans, undo his pants and take it out.”

Evans stared at her for a moment, “Ma’am? Do I get gloves?”

“Just do it Evans.”

Cringing, Evans slowly undid the Sergeant’s pants and fished around until he found it. Evans delicately pulled it out and draped it outside of the Sergeant’s pants.

“So now,” The Lieutenant turned around with the knife from the stove. She paused and put the knife back down. She crouched and stared, “That’s it?” She pulled out a pen and poked it, “I thought they were bigger, and less, floppy? How would that even fit?”

“Excuse me?” Evans stared at the Lieutenant, “Do you know how sex works?”

The Lieutenant straightened up, “Of course I do. My mother told me.”

“What did she tell you?”

“That some day, when I was married, my husband would use his staff on my flowered garden to create life, just like in the beginning.”

“Wow,” Evans looked at his feet, “Your wedding night will be full of surprises… Ma’am.”

“Well what makes you the expert Evans?” Her tone got defensive.

“I’m married Ma’am. And my wife is currently pregnant. Ma’am. Which is evidence that… I have experience in the matter,” Evans laughed slightly and gestured at Knowles, “See, that is what a penis normally looks like. When guys are turned on, then it grows bigger and um… more rigid?” Evans bent over laughing.

The Lieutenant blushed, “Why are you laughing? It is not funny. Now, tell me how to make his… staff bigger.”

“It’s a little funny Ma’am. And… As I said he… needs to be turned on. So um… you would need to either play with it or take off some clothes.”

“OK… Evans, can you… touch his staff and make it bigger?”

“Two things Ma’am. One, it only works if a woman does it. Any two, I find it hilarious that you won’t say penis or vagina. Just ‘Staff’ and ‘Flowered Garden’. I’ve seen you kill people and you are acting like an awkward ten year old.”

The Lieutenant covered her face and walked into the corner, “Those words just are not Ladylike OK?” She picked up the heated knife, “Let’s just do this already.”

Evans grabbed and the Lieutenant started sawing through, “How old are you even Lieutenant?”

When the Lieutenant finished cutting through, she held the heated end to the stump to cauterize the wound. She looked at Evans, “I was born on the First of December 1306. So I’m almost twenty.”

“No shit Ma’am!” Evans laughed as he grabbed some of the cotton, “Me to. We’re twins Lieutenant.” He then held up the severed penis between his fingers, “So what do I do with this Ma’am?”

She blushed, “I am not exactly sure.” She shrugged, “Make him eat it or something?” The Lieutenant then slowly undid the gag.

The Sergeant’s teeth were gritted together and sweat was pouring down his face. The Lieutenant needled the rebar around until the Sergeant screamed. She pointed at Evans, who tossed it into his open mouth. The Lieutenant then put all her weight into forcing his mouth closed. Evans quickly put the gag back in place.

The Lieutenant stared at Evans, “I am not really sure what to do now.” She shrugged, picked up the heated knife, and thrust it into the Sergeant’s neck, leaving it there as he slowly gargled and bled out.

“What are we going to tell the Lieutenant Colonel Ma’am?”

“It is my duty to make sure the soldiers under my command are safe, and he was a threat to my soldiers. He had to die.”

“I’m talking about the obvious torture Ma’am.”

“We’ll bury it in the courtyard, with the Vledscans.”

“Yes Ma’am,” Evans then looked at the Lieutenant’s uniform, “You may want to clean up a little Ma’am. Quite a bit of blood.”

She looked down, “I believe you may want to clean up a little. When we get back behind the lines, you will need to clean off my uniform.”

“You would make my life much easier if you never ever took part in anything violent or dangerous Ma’am.”

“Well then I wouldn’t be doing my job,” She played with one of the buttons on her jacket, “Also, this button is falling off. You need to fix it Evans.”